Acedia & Me: Tedium

          This marks the second in a series of book reviews on the book Acedia & Me by Kathleen Norris.  To see the first installment, check out “Acedia & Me“.

          Acedia, as Kathleen Norris writes, is a Latin term that has fallen out of popular usage (almost out of usage altogether).  It has no direct equivalent in English.  Depression perhaps hits closest to home, but even that falls short.

           There are many components to acedia – how we fall into it and what happens when it strikes.  Norris describes this well as she writes -

 

      I’ve been working too long and need a break; maybe I should read a mystery novel to clear my head, I tell myself that I’m too weary to concentrate.  I tell myself that it is a matter of respecting my limitations, and of being good to myself.  If I manage to read one book, and then return to my other obligations, no harm is done.  But often, one book does not satisfy me.  My “rest” has only made me more restless, and as I finish one book, I am tempted to pick up another.  If I don’t check myself, I can slip into a state both anxious and lethargic, in which I trudge through four or five paperbacks a day, for three or four days running.  I am consuming books rather than reading them.

 

          I know too well that “anxious and lethargic” feeling that comes when I give in to temptation and consume things rather than enjoy them as gifts.  For me it’s not mystery novels.  It’s DVDs of shows like “Monk” or “Seinfeld” or “Friends”.  It’s my blog.  The effect is the same.  In an effort to relax and take my mind off stressful pursuits, I wind up becoming numb.

          Acedia can result in a dangerous “I don’t care” attitude.  Referring to the children’s book Pierre by Maurice Sendak, Norris describes the “lion of acedia”. 

 

…  I can care for so little that it becomes hard to care even whether I live or die.  I need help to learn to see again, and to reclaim my life through ordinary acts: washing my hair, as well as the dishes in the sink, and walking out of doors to enjoy the breeze on my neck.

 

          One of my great hopes in our move Upstate is that living in a farmhouse (with some land) will awaken in me a sense of concern for the earth and our place in it.  I pray that God will open to eyes to see the beautiful sunrise overlooking our pond, to notice the colors of our fruit trees as I prune them, to feel an evening breeze on our porch.  I am hoping and praying to be released from the demon of acedia.